| Secrets
Of Dating Younger Women By David DeAngelo
>>>Important
Note: As I was finishing up writing this newsletter, something very interesting
happened. Read all the way to the very, very end for the story<<<
Ah, younger women. It's taken me a long time now to finally see clearly
that the appeal of younger women is not just "slight". I recently
read somewhere that when men get married for the SECOND time, they marry women
an AVERAGE of 10 years younger. Something like 20% of men who marry
for a second time wind up marrying a woman that is over 20 YEARS YOUNGER.
I also recall reading somewhere that women are universally attracted
to men who are older than them, and that the "average" relationship contains
a man that is four years older than the woman. Interesting stuff.
Remember Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall? Bastard. Or
how about Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones? I hate him, too.
In my own family there are age gaps ranging from 10 years to over 40
years. Yea, you read that one right. Over 40 years. I won't
even go there... Let's just say that it brings a whole new meaning
to "I traded my 40 in for two 20s". I guess what I'm trying to say here
is that this pattern of older men dating and marrying younger women isn't
going away anytime soon. In fact, I personally believe that the more
"socially acceptable" it becomes, the MORE it's going to happen.
For most of my adult life, I've dated women that were either my own age, or
very close. But for some reason, right about when I turned 30, I
began sometimes dating women who were younger than me. At first it
was a little bit strange. I didn't feel like I had anything to talk
about with a woman who was five or ten years younger than me. But
the more it happened, the more I realized that younger women have a certain
appeal that goes far beyond just the "physical beauty". Younger women
just have a different VIBE. If you meet the right younger woman, you'll
find that she can bring an amazing energy, vibe, and youthful atmosphere to
your life. After having the experience myself, talking to other guys
who have shared it, and reading about it a lot, I can say that many guys have
the experience of FEELING YOUNGER and MORE VITAL when dating a younger woman.
It can be a blast. Now, I'm not saying that it's a bad idea to
date women your own age, or women who are older than you. Not at
all, in fact. I'm just saying that if you find yourself attracted
to younger women, it's perfectly OK. And I want to devote this newsletter
to the topic of how to successfully date younger women. Keep your
eye out in the near future for a newsletter titled "How to date women that
are old enough to be your grandma". Somehow I don't expect that one to
be quite as popular as this one... lol. OK, let's get to it.
First I want to talk about my take on younger women in general, then
I'd like to share some specific techniques and ideas for dating them...
YOUNGER WOMEN MATURE FASTER Now, we've all heard that "Women
mature faster than men", right? Well if you could have the opportunity
to listen to a group of four 20-year-old models standing in front of the
bathroom mirror at an A-List club in Los Angeles or New York, I think
you might change your mind... My personal view is that SOME women mature
faster than most men... and that SOME women have a SIDE of them that matures
faster than most men. All women don't mature faster than all men.
But there are those women that DO mature faster... and these younger
women can be VERY interesting to hang out with. Take a minute and
imagine what it would be like to be an attractive 18-year-old young woman
who has just graduated from high school and is starting her first year in
college. Let's assume that she's above average in the looks department,
smart, and beginning to enjoy her new-found freedom and independence.
What would be going through your mind? How would you be approaching
the world? Well, I think that you'd probably have begun to realize
(in a big way, most likely) that you have a certain POWER over most men.
You've probably also begun to realize that there are certain types of
"boyz" that hold a certain appeal... and ones that trigger a certain type
of magnetic attraction in you. (If you've had a chance to go through
my Advanced Dating Techniques Program, then you understand that this ATTRACTION
is being triggered by certain traits, and not just good looks.)
Now, without taking too long to explain the point, if you think about it,
the traits that trigger ATTRACTION in women are MORE likely to be found
in an OLDER man than a YOUNGER one. Traits like higher status, masculinity,
leadership, mystery, challenge, confidence, and composure... and many others.
It often takes men DECADES to cultivate the traits that are attractive
to women... and you'll notice that when they do, they often act like they
just discovered the concept of FRICTION... and they behave accordingly.
And if you were an attractive younger woman who was just "finding her
wings" in life, you'd be responding to this in a way that you probably
wouldn't be able to explain. The point? Younger women are
more likely to feel ATTRACTION for a man who is older. This principle
has proven itself to me over and over... and the more I look around, the
more I see it in action. IS IT "NORMAL" TO DATE A WOMAN WHO
IS YOUNGER THAN YOU? One thing that makes this particular topic
very interesting to me is that it often evokes VERY emotional responses from
people. Some people say "It's sick for an older man to date a younger
woman"... some people see it as perfectly normal... and some see it as
MORE normal than men dating women their own age. Everyone has an
opinion about it, one way or another. The reason that this is important
is that the younger women you'd like to date have a wide range of opinions
as well. IN other words, one 20-year-old woman might think that the
idea of dating a guy who is 27 is TOTALLY GROSS, while the next one might
only find herself attracted to men who are over 30. The point I'm
making here is that if you are going to date younger women, you must not
let yourself be overly influenced by the opinions of others... especially
the women you would like to date. Just because one woman says "I
think that any guy who asks a woman out who is more than three years younger
is sick" doesn't mean that ALL women think that way. The girl right
behind her might say "I just don't have a clue why ANY woman would want to
date ANY guy who's under 40... they're all immature". If you wind
up talking to a woman who isn't interested because you're "too old", just
move on... and don't let it distract you. CATEGORIES AND CATEGORIES
I've found that women usually fit into one of the following three categories
when it comes to how they view this topic: 1) "It's perfectly normal"
Maybe 20%) 2) "It's taboo, and very intriguing" (Maybe 20%)
3) "It's GROSS!" (Maybe 60%) I just made these numbers up based on my
personal experience and my personal observations. Some guys I know ONLY
date women who are much younger than themselves... and their experience
is that MOST younger women want to date guys who are older... see for yourself.
Next, I personally think that maybe only 25% of the younger women you
meet are even worth your time and attention. 75% are in the categories
of not interested in older guys, not attractive physically or personality-wise,
too immature, etc. Of those that ARE worth pursuing, most fit into
one of a few categories: 1) Damn smart, high standards, and on the path
to bettering herself. This young woman will often respect you and
admire you for your experience in life, and look to you for approval, advice,
and input. She will probably get a thrill from being with a guy who
is mature, sophisticated, and who knows how to make her feel good physically.
This woman might be the daughter of a strict and/or religious family
who is now experimenting with her independence. 2) Attractive, and
overly-concerned with what others think... very competitive, life revolves
around boys. If you meet a woman who is between 18 and 23, and she's
a model, actress, dancer, or other "entertainer", you'll often find this personality
type... Often these girls like to PARTY. Drama usually isn't
far away. These women often enjoy the thrill that being with an older
guy brings. They are often found on the arm of rich, playboy types...
because they like the attention and material gifts and advantages.
WARNING: These women, in my experience, are more likely to be users, cheaters,
and the types that turn your emotional life upside-down with all kinds
of unimaginable drama. Buyer beware. 3) The nice girl who likes
you. Maybe not stunning, and maybe not a super-genius, but likes the fact
that she's met a man who is a MAN... and who makes her feel good.
Most of these women have a common realization that guys their age just don't
"get it". They're tired of hearing about dumb "guy stuff", and they
are fascinated by a man who is both clearly in control of himself and his
environment, and very aware of how to treat a woman... how to make her feel
good... how to take his time. These women can be great fun, and they
can be a real joy to be around. They often bring a fun, spontaneous energy
to the relationship, and they make things a little unpredictable.
Now this isn't a complete list. And it's not exact. But it's
pretty accurate, and if you use these categories as general guides, you'll
begin to understand and have more success in your interactions with younger
women. THE SPECIFICS... WHAT, WHEN, HOW WHY, WHERE...
Here are some specific ideas for dating younger women. REMEMBER:
These are WOMEN. They're not a different species, and everything else that
you've learned from me applies as well. 1) Be Cool, Dude. When
most older guys meet a younger woman that they feel attracted to, they immediately
begin to act WEIRD. They stop acting like "themselves". Now,
women don't know what you're like "normally", but they can tell INSTANTLY
if you're NOT ACTING LIKE YOURSELF. Us guys do all kinds of subtle
and not-so- subtle little things when we're feeling nervous... and these
things give women the HEEBIE JEEBIES! So be cool. Relax.
Don't act like a Wussbag. 2) Treat her like a BRATTY LITTLE
SISTER. Now that you're being "cool", take it to the NEXT LEVEL...
Use one of my favorite personal techniques, and treat her like your BRATTY
LITTLE SIS. Tease her. Make fun. It's OK, go for it.
Say all the things you never had a chance to say when you were a freshman.
Now's your big chance! And don't worry about it when she plays
"fake mad". Just turn it up some more. Oh, and call her on everything
she does or says that's immature. I can't go into all the reasons
why this is a great idea, but it is. You keep your power, you have all
kinds of opportunities to be Cocky & Funny, and you can always keep things
interesting and challenging. Oh, and it's COMPLETELY different than the
way most Wussies treat her... which is good. 3) Don't try to follow
or get her to lead. Women in general are not attracted to men who
don't take the lead... and younger women are no exception. In fact,
younger women have less experience in life, so trying to get them to lead
and tell you what they want you to do is just a horrible idea.
Don't do it. You lead. You decide where you're going. You make the
rules. If you try to make her the boss, you'll run her off faster
than you can say "I touch myself". 4) Don't try to take advantage
of the situation. Most attractive young women have had at LEAST one
"icky older guy" that "tried something" with her. Younger women are
HYPER-ALERT when it comes to sketchy behavior. If you try to take
advantage of the situation or try to "make a move" too early, you'll most
likely signal to her that you're a "perv" and that you aren't to be trusted.
Lean back. Chill. Give her room. when you walk
down the street with her, bump into her and push her AWAY from you.
Tell her not to walk too close to you... tell her that other people might
think something. If you're alone with her in your living room, don't
sit right next to her. If she touches you while talking, don't touch
her back... or even make fun of it and say "Keep your hands off the goods".
5) Don't intrude on or interfere with her life. You must remember
that younger women have lives of their own. Often they're very close
to their families, and they're unsure of how their families would respond
if they found out that their pride and joy daughter was dating an older guy.
Remember, she just got FREE of the overbearing father... and she doesn't
need a new one. Don't call her at work, don't show up to see her
unexpectedly, and don't embarrass her. If you want to make an attractive
young woman perform magic (the instant disappearing act), just interfere
with her life. She's free, so let her be free. Encourage it, even.
Don't interfere. 6) Let her come to you... don't chase her.
If you want to make friends with a cat, the best tactic is to IGNORE
IT. Cats are interesting creatures. Have you ever noticed that
if you chase a cat, it will run... but if you sit and ignore it, you'll
soon find yourself pushing it off of your lap? Same goes for younger
women. Like I just mentioned, younger women have often just "escaped"
from controlling parents, structured lives, and zero freedom. If
she's attracted to you, it's not because you're creating the environment that
she just left... it's because you represent something different.
You'll find that if you call her all the time and chase her, she'll be harder
to get a hold of, and less likely to continue to see you. If
you let her go, let her live her life, and make yourself more scarce, you'll
be more likely to have her pursuing YOU. Be the man that she's always
dreamed about, and then don't chase her. 7) EXPECT her to change.
If you're dating a woman between the ages of 18 and 23, you need to remember
that her life is probably going to change DRAMATICALLY over the next few
years. You need to keep an open mind, and not try to restrict or
hinder her options. You need to expect and even encourage her to
grow, change, and become all she can be. The reality is that the chances
are SLIM that she's going to be with you in a few years. In fact,
the chances are slim that she's even going to be the same person in a few
years. Get over it, and be OK with it. Challenge her to grow,
achieve, and be her best... and don't accept second-class behavior from
her. But she's going to change, so expect it. 8) Be CHIVILROUS.
Most younger women have had VERY FEW men in their lives who even know
what the word "Chivalry" means. If you're one of those men, then
you need to LEARN what the word means. Opening doors, walking on
the outside of the curb, and pulling out chairs makes a BIG impression
on younger women. When you combine a masculine, powerful presence
with chivalry, you will stand out and make yourself VERY intriguing and attractive.
9) Stay totally calm in the face of drama. Younger women often
have a lot of drama happening around them, and they often act dramatic.
I could write an entire book about all the things that a young woman
has going on around her that are TOTALLY UNSTABLE... And the most
influential one is the other people in her life. If she freaks out
about something, don't let it get to you. Stay cool and calm.
Don't try to fix all her problems, and don't try to stand in for her
dad. She isn't looking for advice, so don't give it to her (unless
she asks seriously, and in a non-emotional tone). One of the things
that makes you attractive as an older man is the stability that you bring.
So BRING IT. 10) Be conscious of how often you see her and
speak with her. Younger women are less in-control of their emotions...
and can become attached more quickly and easily. The "trigger" for
a woman "becoming attached" is how often you see her and talk to her.
If you want to trigger the "relationship" mechanism, spend a lot of time
with her. If you DON'T want to trigger those emotions, you need to
limit the time you spend with her. As a rule of thumb, don't see her
more than once a week, and don't talk to her more than once or twice a
week unless you want her to start becoming very attached to you.
And I don't care what you SAY... it's the AMOUNT OF TIME you spend with her
that makes this determination. Trust me. UNDERSTAND
ATTRACTION As always, the most IMPORTANT thing you must understand
when dating younger women is how ATTRACTION WORKS. If you don't understand
ATTRACTION, then none of what I just taught you will make a damn bit of
difference... In fact, if you don't understand ATTRACTION, then most
of the things I just taught you above will probably BACKFIRE on you.
So what's the best way to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you?
In fact, what's the fastest, most efficient, most complete, most EFFECTIVE
way to learn how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you available in the
world? I'd say that it's my eBook, Double Your Dating. And after
spending YEARS figuring all of this stuff out, you can believe me when I say
that this is the book that I wish I would have had when I first started.
If you put a young, beautiful woman in a guys house on his couch, he
doesn't know the FIRST THING about how to make her feel ATTRACTION for
him. He'll do things to please her, hoping that at some point she begins to
get "into the mood"... and then somehow lets him know. It will NEVER
HAPPEN. But if that guy knows the secrets of how to make a woman
feel ATTRACTION... and how to smoothly take things to a physical level
without triggering resistance and rejection... then he will be successful
almost every time. If you want to be that guy, then you need to get
yourself a copy of my eBook. It is literally JAM PACKED with hundreds
and hundreds of techniques for making women, young and not-so-young, feel
ATTRACTION for you. And if that wasn't enough, I
now publish a free dating tips
newsletter that teaches any guy how to increase his success with women
DRAMATICALLY. It's
free, there's no obligation, I'll never share your email address with anyone,
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To sign up for my free three-times-a-week
newsletter AND download your copy of this online eBook, just go here:
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IRONIC PROLOGUE: As I sit here in Starbucks writing this
newsletter on my laptop, across from me is a couple sitting at a table talking.
And guess what? He's obviously older. He's probably in his early
30s. She looks and sounds like she's around 19 or 20 years old.
It's obvious that this is the first time that they've met (they're wrapping
up their conversation, and she just said "It was nice meeting you").
He wasn't saying much, and she was basically doing all the talking...
and boy was she ever talking. About a million miles a minute... She
was leading the entire conversation, and he was trying to be a "nice guy"
and let her lead things. She was talking about what life was like
before she moved away from her parents. She was saying "My parents were
overbearing" and talking about what it was like to live at home.
The guy was sitting there nervously talking to her... and fidgeting.
She was asking him questions like "What is your family like", and he was trying
to give her "good answers" like "My family is nice, and my parents are
sweet" etc. It was obvious that she was trying to keep the conversation
going, and he was trying his best not to "say anything stupid"... he was
trying to seem like a "nice guy". At one point when she asked him a question,
he sat forward, turned his hands up in the air in a "I'm just a regular guy,
nothing special here" gesture, and answered about himself. They just
got up and left. It was PAINFULLY CLEAR to me that this guy did NOT
understand what to do in this situation. He probably met her online in
a chat or on a personals website. He was probably all excited about
meeting her. He probably offered to take her to dinner, and paid
for an expensive meal... and maybe even a movie before winding up at Starbucks.
He probably has no idea whether or not she is interested in him, and
he will probably go home tonight wishing he would have kissed her... and
wishing he would have "made a move". He didn't get it. DON'T
BE THAT GUY! OK, enough of my ranting. Go sign up for my newsletter,
check out the samples of my eBook, and get yourself a copy. It's the
answer: •
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And Download eBook •
And I'll talk to you again soon.
Your Friend,

David DeAngelo
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